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Weapons of mass destruction

Discussion in 'music' started by JTC, Jul 25, 2003.

  1. JTC

    JTC PFM Villager...

    Following on from George Dubya's quest to plant^H^H^H^H^H find evidence to frame the Iraqi regime, I thought I'd have a wee look around at our own weapons of mass destruction.

    In third place, and a real scourge of society, is the Boy Racer Boombox. Is it just me who really hates the thummm thummm of clapped out Astras with big alloys parading up and down the promenade? Is it really necessary to subject us to this, requiring us to underpin our houses and sedate our cats? I say, let's add a new element to car insurance. Let's calculate it not only on the basis of age, motor and so on, but also on the size of the stereo on board multiplied by the number of 'Oakley' or 'Max Power' stickers. Add £1000/year if the windows are blacked out, and £5000/year as good measure if they can't name at least six cabinet members and spell 'courteous'. Or shoot the bloody lot of them.

    In second place is the Mobile Electric Telephone Ringing Tone. If I hear another polyphonic tone that 'phone's going right up where the tones don't ring. Grrrrrr....

    But in first place, and the most Evil Weapon of Mass Destruction has to be the Bagpipes. Are these necessary? As a Scot, I feel torn between pride that such an instrument once won wars, and despair at the fact that they are legal, freely available, nay encouraged in schools, and produce tonality so screechy it would make badly set up Kans seem pleasant. I'm fairly sure that they'd be far better employed in the boring of concrete.

    Okay, Friday rant off. I'm going for a lie down.

  2. VanceB

    VanceB Member

    But it precisely because they sound like that, that they won wars. It was the troops desperately trying to get away from them that did it. :)
  3. joel

    joel Painter of Dragons, Maker of Mirrors

    With the Bagpipes, Scotland invented Shock and Awe - or was it Scotch and Awe :p
    That wuld have done the trick trick with Uday and co - a company of the Blackwatch's finest pipers doing Rod Stewart's greatest hits round-the-clock in front of the compound, and they have been jelly afore the day was oot.
    On second thoughts, perhaps it was more humane to have stormed the building with conventional weapons.
  4. prowla

    prowla pfm Member

    Electronic kids toys - bloody annoying.

    (Kinda tenuous link to music though - more like "off topic"?)
  5. Mike Sae

    Mike Sae Infinitely Baffled

    I'm in the market for a new phone.
    Does the standard "bell" ring on a ployphonic phone sound childish and annoying?
  6. Mick Seymour

    Mick Seymour Member

    I always use a standard ring on the mobile. It's all very well using a favourite tune but just as you're getting into it, the bugger at the other end hangs up!

  7. SteveC

    SteveC Satisficing

    Just shows ... being able to follow the tune is no test of whether it's good hi-fi.


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